Yesterday was my baby’s 1st birthday. But it was also another birthday….. My little angel Johnny would have been 8 years old. He was only 14 months old when he died. I though about him a lot last night….and found out I hardly ever saw him…I almost missed knowing him because I was never home. I do remember his smile tho…he had his mom’s looks 🙂
I could very well blame my mother for everything…for me not being able to spend time with my children…. She kept me busy…I don’t think that I would have been able to say no to her and not work…but I liked what I was doing….She had her reasons and I had mine. I though about it last night how my life would be if they hadn’t died that night…if we had taken them with us……My twins would be 12 years old!! I wonder what they would be like… Kim, would she still be playing the piano? …or would Megan have a zoo in her room? David was almost 3 years old when he died… He was never quiet…lol… he never got tired off asking questions….like he wanted to know everything there was to know….. It’s a very easy for me to fall into the hole of regret…to wonder about what if? and why? and not remember the good times we had together.