I know I don’t need to apologize for entry like the one I posted yesterday but I’ve had received e-mails for people that were worried…and I am sorry I didn’t mean to make people worry about me.

I’m not sure what was going on with me though I was having major hallucinations, which I have had before by the way. I don’t really remember much about yesterday so if anyone contacted me yesterday afternoon I was probably acting very strange. My doctor wants me to start taking something that might help me with this but unfortunately that means according to him that I have to switch antidepressants again.

Eeech here I go on apologizing again…. I do that a lot don’t I? Sometimes I feel that I have to please everyone… agree with everyone… so people will like me, maybe…. I do have my own opinions but most of the time I don’t really tell what I thing…just… yes I agree… or yes I feel the same way… Maybe I do this to avoid conversation with people… I’m trying to change that …at least online but…well I’m not really doing such a great job at it, I think. But really… that’s not about me not wanting to write about it…it’s more about finding the right words…or to get the words out of my head and on to the screen through the keyboard…

I’ve never thought of my self as someone that has a talent for writing… Believe me I have a much bigger talent in “thinking”. My “bottleneck” is where the words come out… whether it’s through writing on a peace of paper or on to the screen… not to mention speech… hmmmm now there is a brick wall that I need to brake down and I will one day…

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