(This is actually an edited and “added to” post that was written and posted at a Yahoo Club where I am a member.)

I wish everyone could show a bit more understanding about multiplicity as you have shown after some of our posts… Even in the medical profession all around the world there are people that deny the fact that multiplicity exists…


I have a goal I am working towards …to get to know all of the others, and to accept them for who and what they are…. but for me integration (us to become “one”) isn’t necessarily the only way of healing…. There are other possibilities…. I know there are many out there that think that it is somehow wrong of me to decide if I want to “become one” or not… but to me multiplicity isn’t something that needs to be gotten rid of or cured…. it is the confusion that comes with it that is the problem. The confusion of memory loss… “getting lost” and the individual problems that each of us has of their own like depression, eating disorders, self destruction, anxiety and phobias that each of us has to work out…. a lot of non multiple people deal with those same problems the only difference is that they don’t share a body with someone else…

I am working on my problems and they are working on theirs. Some we are ready to work on and some we are not ready for yet. But we are all working and trying to live in peace with each other and I think that for me at least that it can not occur until we have taken every piece of puzzle in our past and but it together in one picture… It is a painful and scary journey and once it begins there is no return. I don’t regret starting it… Once it starts you can’t go back and decide that you don’t want to “go there”…. you can’t decide you’ve had enough and just throw away the puzzle pieces. If you do that…. they’ll just come back at you when you think you’re safe…. I tried to “block” them out but it didn’t work. I am not ashamed of being multiple and I need, as all multiples, the world to know what multiplicity is… however my biggest fear has always been is that “we” may say or do something that will hurt other people’s feelings or confusing people….Yes Sharona of the Army… you commented to this entry…that you felt that I seemed paranoid about confusing people… you are right… I am paranoid about it but I’m also paranoid about people meeting some of us and that they won’t see them as I see them. Some of us can seem nasty…even evil… I guess this is a some sort of an abandonment issue for me though… and this is why I feel that I have to apologize all the time…

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