…a friend on an instant messenger: good morning! How are you today?
…me: (thinking: what’s so good about this morning?) I’m doing OK… how are you?
The friend replies and says he/she’s doing good… the conversation goes on with a usual chit chat… but I think to myself… what if I’d told the truth? That I am feeling miserable, that I am seeing things that aren’t there, that I am hearing things that no one else can hear, that I feel I am going to lose my mind completely… that I hate myself…that I hate my life… that I don’t care anymore… and I can’t really pinpoint why I feel like that… I don’t know what or if I can to do to make it stop….
I don’t know Gabriel.. Maybe it will come as time goes by.
There are always good days sometimes, inbetween a pile of bad days. Live for those good days, and believe in them. I do. It makes things easier, it often does.
Please just keep believing that it will get better. Maybe there is nothing you can do, nothing but wait and hold on.
*hugs*
Im in one of those ruts right now. Where it all just seems bad, I’m unhappy with everything and I don’t know how to change it all. I hate it.
Letting out to a close friend helps, makes things seem a little more manageable. Just take some time for yourself too, find something you like doing and DO it. To hell with everything else. Smile 🙂