I think the summer makes me lazy to be at the computer… and somewhat the health problems (besides the “normal” mental problems) are making me lazy as well…

Maybe “lazy” isn’t the right word but I’m not quite sure what it is… Just different…. maybe…

I am not much of an outdoor person…or I haven’t been one in the past mostly due to the fact that I’m severely agoraphobic. But now I have a back yard and a porch… my own house… and I think I’ve started to realize how good that is… I was afraid at first… just sitting out there… and wanted to run back inside to the safety of my walls and my sealing… but now… especially on a sunny day like today… when I wake up in the morning I *want* to take out my paper journal and a pencil and sit out there in the sun and write…

Maybe… one day I will also slowly start to move further from the house… and actually loving it.