Will someone please give me a good old fashion kick in the butt?
I think that’s what I need right now….
No need for you to continue reading… only obsessive ED thoughts…..
This morning I saw how much I weigh … it’s not like my weight has changed much since the last time I saw it… but yet seeing that number makes something inside my head go crazy and all those bad/negative thoughts take over…. I know very well that my weight is way too low for my height… yes I really do know that…. but the number makes me feel huge…
So since I saw the number… I’ve been obsessing about it…. wishing there was a way to make it go lower… I do remember what it felt like to be much lower than that… I dream about being there again… and a big part of me wants it back… but then I remember….
I need to stop obsessing…. I need to sop letting this effect me so much… I need to stop calculating my calorie intake …
note to self: “dam-it don’t you get it? The number won’t change? and it wont get any lower… only up and you need to accept that”
*kicks self in the butt and wanders off into the lala land of html/css and other behind the scenes activities*